When you’re feeling stuck, these questions will help you shift out of avoidance and into action.
I’ve used these with coaching clients and organizations for more than a decade, and they’ve always helped to elicit the feelings we need to experience to begin a task we’re dreading or reignite momentum for a change we’ve already made.
The Three Sources of Motivation
To find the spark to begin or continue, it’s important to understand the three most important factors fueling motivation in humans:
- Personal Reasons – why you care. When you think of the end result of the completed task, how do you feel? Why do you feel that way? This is your compelling why for doing the task.
- If we were improving our cardiovascular health, for example, our answer might be related to having a sense of freedom in our bodies and peace of mind that our body has what it needs to operate well.
- Social Support– how others influence you. The people we’re around can have a significant influence on our desire to do something. If the people around you aren’t a “good” influence for this particular task, consider spending time with others who are.
- Even if it’s the host of a podcast or YouTube video, it’s important to find the tribe that’s in sync with what you want to achieve.
- In our cardiovascular health example, this might look like doing your workouts at the gym instead of at home or doing weekly meal planning with a friend who has similar nutritional goals.
- Environmental Incentives – how your surroundings or systems make the behavior easier or harder. Our human brains are wired for finding the easiest way to do something. If the thing you want to accomplish feels like a hassle, you’re more likely to choose an easier option or avoid it altogether.
- For our example of improving cardiovascular health, we might remove unhealthy snacks from the house and ensure healthy, tasty alternatives are easy to see and access.
Let’s try it out and get you fired up and ready to go! Ask yourself:
Personal Reasons
1 – What will I feel when this is done? (Ex: free, confident, self-respect, a sense of relief)
2 – What will it cost me if I don’t begin? (Ex: lingering stress, disappointment in myself, worry)
Social Support
3 – Who is on a similar journey and how can I spend time with them? (Ex: family, friends, podcast host, social media content creator)
Environmental Incentives
4 – What can you change about your environment to make it easier to do the new behavior and harder to do the behavior you’d like to leave behind?
And one final question to use behavioral science to jump-start your momentum –
5 – What small action could you take in the next five minutes to move this forward?
A note from me to you
You have all my best wishes – and lots of energy – to tackle this! Go slow if you need to. Honor your body’s rhythms and signals. There’s no valor in shaming yourself into action, and guilt is not a sustainable, healthy motivator. Talk to yourself the way a loving friend would talk to you.
And if the questions above reveal that this task you’ve been putting off just isn’t worth doing – consider that as an option. We often get caught up in what we “should” be doing and don’t take enough time to check in with ourselves to see if this helps us get closer to where we truly want to go and who we truly want to be. And knowing where we truly want to go and who we truly want to be – that’s a very powerful motivator.
Resources – This strategy is adapted from Social Cognitive Theory, the COM-B model, and Self-Determination Theory.
About the Author
Jessica Walter is a strategy partner and trusted advisor to senior executives looking to create energized, high-performing teams. With 20+ years in executive industry leadership and consulting, she specializes in uncovering the root causes of culture, engagement, change management, and communication challenges and crafting actionable strategies to drive sustainable turnarounds.
Author of Shifting the Energy: How Love Leads Remarkable Teams, Jessica has guided more than 30 organizations through complex culture shifts and shared insights from research involving over 200,000 employees. Her work has been featured at leadership and psychology conferences and in publications like HR Director and Training Magazine.
Jessica holds a master’s in Leadership and Business Ethics from Duquesne, studied Executive Influence at Wharton, earned a bachelor’s in Mass Communication from Towson, and maintains multiple certifications in coaching and organizational assessments. Based near Gettysburg, PA, she is the proud mom of a former U.S. Army Paratrooper with the 82nd Airborne Division.
leadingperspectives.org 